Collapse

Will You pick up the pieces
if I just fall apart?
Think I'm going to collapse-
for rest my soul is parched.
My body even aches,
I'm tired and I'm weak;
this exhaustion in my heart...
I think I've hit the peak.

Feel the need for an escape
in this calling, I'm alone;
find myself lost in my flesh
and calling it my home.
Depending on myself, not You
to get me through each day-
I incessantly grow faint
as I wish my time away...
I long for understanding,
in someone to confide-
But I hold back signs of weakness,
in bondage to my pride.

This feels like it's too heavy-
too high a price to pay;
This race is too severe-
finish line's so far away.
Can't get out of bed,
yet even there I cannot sleep;
After each long day of sowing seeds
no harvest yet to reap.
Comfort unattainable,
don't know what else to do
I reach, I cry, I ask-
yet still don't feel close to You.

Give me true perception,
genuine understanding of You.
I'm falling in deception,
desiring credit for what I do.
I'm sitting on the throne,
pushing You back onto the cross;
counting my life and ability as gain-
and all You offer, loss.
It wears hard on my soul
when I look to it for relief
it brings me to this breaking point
bound up in this grief.

Lord, I'm just so tired.
Rest is a long lost friend.
When will I find tranquility,
safe in Your hands again?
You say "Come to me, all who are weary
and I will give you rest;"
Lord, can I ask You to show me that,
put You to the test?
"Take my yoke upon you,
I am gentle and humble in heart,"
Have I not taken it upon me?
When does liberation start?
"For my yoke is easy
and my burden it is light."
You make it sound so simple,
yet I toss and turn all night.

I guess what I am saying-
I surrender yet again;
I know that I create a rift
when I live by my own plans.
But I want You and I need You
I have nothing left to give;
How can I go on and work,
when fatigue makes it hard to live?
Please come down and sweep me up,
save me from what I do.
At least do something through this rut
that brings glory back to You.